How concern are you with the compatibility of your future partner?

ifanonline

When choosing your future spouse, compatibility issues comes into play...dlm erti kata lain, kesesuaian dan keserasian pasangan. They say opposite attracts, but it may not be the case for some.

What do you think?

lostfaith

Sebelum kawin memanglah opposite attrack. Selepas kawin dah anak bagai barulah sedar tak sesuai. Menderita dlm diam jerlah. Bertahan demi status dan anak anak. Kita bertanggungjawab menbawa anak ke dunia. Takkan nak bg kehidupan dia pincang hanya kerana ketidaksesuaian kita. So selagi boleh bertahan, bertahan jerlah.

malukokram

nak jawap.. tapi terganggu dengan gamba profile tt..

ifanonline

lostfaith replied at 28-10-2016 06:29 PM
Sebelum kawin memanglah opposite attrack. Selepas kawin dah anak bagai barulah sedar tak sesuai. Men ...

we can say that the theory 'opposite attracts' sebenarnya tidak boleh di terima pakai...bole share ape yg tidak compatible tu?

ifanonline

malukokram replied at 28-10-2016 06:36 PM
nak jawap.. tapi terganggu dengan gamba profile tt..

hehe..abaian pic tu...

CardiGans85

To me,every day is a new chapter of life. Any differences between me n my spouse kena berbincang dgn hormat,sabar n rs cinta.
Ni pkara yg kami pegang. Sbb,bila dah kawen ni kdg2 3 pkara ni dah mnurun atau xde n tjadilah hbgn satu hala. Pkara ni x sihat..kdg2 some people stay dlm pkahwinan, atas sbb kompromi.
Compatible or not, sblm kahwin kena tgk la sama ada diri tu selesa x bila bsama. Dan bila bmslh,senang x bw bbincang? Klu stakat minat x sama pd sesuatu aktiviti tu bole d pupuk.
Sy bkn ckp sbb rs good2 ke ape,tp dr pglmn sndiri n skeliling. Sape x nk bahagia sampai ke syurga kan..

mbhcsf

opposites attracts sure lah  ? but for me what is dictated by the hadith sahih on  ladies are married  due to 4 reasons ...and one of them is...  - so same goes with the guys too - kan...so this is no1.
no. 2 : sekufu/ compatibility is important . how  important - depends on the background , laid belief , value system, personality etc etc.

mbhcsf

ifan  you have 100% capability of choosing an avvy yg boleh bagi u  pahala yg berterusan Ifan...so be that guy.

mbhcsf

ifanonline replied at 28-10-2016 07:04 PM
we can say that the theory 'opposite attracts' sebenarnya tidak boleh di terima pakai...bole share ...

for one - it is still a theory....proven? by far - how much - one shoe fits for all ke? tak kan?

ifanonline

mbhcsf replied at 29-10-2016 02:20 AM
for one - it is still a theory....proven? by far - how much - one shoe fits for all ke? tak kan?

there is always an exception to the rule...but secara asasnya, 'opposite attracts theory' is not for the general masses...in partner finding, the traditional and conservative way is still the best method...

as you said, in islam, the key is islam and sekufu...but for other, try to adhere to the traditional way of searching for your future partner...

but this thread is not aboutn traditional method...but how far can you go to find the suitable partner? is it meant to be? is it in your genes? qada dan qadar?

ati2027

for me, dah tue jodoh kita. mesti la kita attract.

mbhcsf

ifanonline replied at 29-10-2016 07:01 AM
there is always an exception to the rule...but secara asasnya, 'opposite attracts theory' is not f ...

the ikhtiar is up to the individual and how far would a person go ..itu i think it is purely Allah's affairs.
ikhitiar tawakkal kita

tang bab qada qadar? takdir muallaq mubram

tapi macam nilah
ask for someone yg  DIA IZIN dan REDHA.

ifanonline

mbhcsf replied at 29-10-2016 08:50 PM
the ikhtiar is up to the individual and how far would a person go ..itu i think it is purely Allah ...

yes...it is allah affairs..but as a human being, we too would like to love someone that we can see physically...it is a normal human feeling...

setiap manusia mencari eternal love...cinta buat selama-lamanya...but as hamba allah, benda ni tidak akan tercapai melainkan cinta kpd allah...

but allah gives a glimpse of love to all human being...the feeling of love...rugilah mana2 manusia yg tidak pernah merasai nikmat cinta sesama insan..

mbhcsf

ifanonline replied at 29-10-2016 09:30 PM
yes...it is allah affairs..but as a human being, we too would like to love someone that we can see ...

mengapa cinta sesama insan you kejar - kalau go for cinta seseorang kerana Allah dan untuk redhadan izinnya
dan ganjarannya di akhirat
would u stil be talking about nak kejar cinta insan mendpaat cinta insan?

hmm.........susah cinta ni it is not easy
berat dan sekadar  i membuat satu pernyataan

pelicano

Love is not about being compatible, it's about accepting the incompatibility

ifanonline

pelicano replied at 30-10-2016 10:15 AM
Love is not about being compatible, it's about accepting the incompatibility

interesting...but what if it is too obvious? i mean the incompatibility...would u still go through it?

mystica

biasalah manusia... kita kan sgt curious.. sbb tu opposites attract. bila org tu nmpk different mula la dtg perasaan ingin tahu tu..

tp lepas tu tgk pula mampu tak kita sesuaikan diri dengan kelainan tersebut.

papepun yg penting kena lah serasi. kalau tak serasi mmg sukar la hubungan nak bertahan.

pelicano

ifanonline replied at 30-10-2016 10:35 AM
interesting...but what if it is too obvious? i mean the incompatibility...would u still go through ...

Actually it depends...apa yg ko rasa incompatible sekarang maybe takda benda pun 10 years down the lane.  Kalau ko rasa hubungan tu worth fighting for, e.g ko rasa the other half can be the best person to become the mother of your children, or someone you can see yourself grow old with, mungkin you can just live with the differences.

Yg penting both parties must be aware of the incompatibility, so that the relationship would  involve both making efforts to minimise conflicts that may arise from
the differences. Kalau sorang jer kerja keras utk maintain hubungan, kita akan Jadi psychologically sangat penat dan mudah berputus asa. Pokok pangkalnya kena discuss lah bro dgn si dia... tak boleh assume2...nanti menyesal.

ifanonline

pelicano replied at 30-10-2016 04:42 PM
Actually it depends...apa yg ko rasa incompatible sekarang maybe takda benda pun 10 years down the ...

to minimize incompatibility and to maximize compatibility...

mbhcsf

ifanonline replied at 30-10-2016 05:05 PM
to minimize incompatibility and to maximize compatibility...

macam nilah Ifan

u tengok neraca

dia sentiasa balance

kalau seseorang manusia tu perfect ...semua ciri - ciri ksempuranaan tu boleh disukat ( katakanlah ) perfect habis - apa jadi kat neraca tu - lop sided kan ? macam berat je sebelah , sendeng, pencong? kan? skewed?

so kalau lop sided then...perfect tak balance tu - dah tak perfect

sebab  nak 'perfect '?adakah outcome yg dilihat akan jadi perfect? nope.

tak juga

so it is about  maintaining the critical balance ...and that is why you need religion, maturity, smart wise sensible person to realise ' perfect imperfection = perfect , lagu menulis bukan kerna nama tu memang humbling.

unless prophet tu depa kategori lain lah depamaksum etc , role model  dan dengan sifat wajib dan mustahil sebab depa nak jadi contoh dan tauladan pada umat manusia...sebab tu depa kalangan manusia bukan malaikat ...

llah kita Allah SWT  itu yg Maha Sempurna