Gentle Speech

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Gentle Speech

"Much talking is a source of danger,
Through silence misfortune is avoided,
The talkative parrot in a cage is shut,
While birds that cannot talk fly freely."
~ Tibetan Yogi ~

Man has been able to rise above animals and build great civilizations and complex systems because of his ability to communicate through speech and writing. Not only is he able to communicate with contemporaries, he is able to set his ideas in writing to communicate with future generations long after he is dead.

In modern society, communications play a crucial role in human relationships. From birth, we have the inborn urge to talk and communicate with these we come into contact with. Well used, words can help us a great deal. But often, we speak hastily without thinking about what we are going to say. By then, it is too late since words once spoken can never be withdrawn. We many apologize and retract them, but the damage is already done.

Another writer says, " Words are the dress of thoughts which should no more be presented in rags, tatters and dirt than your personal should."

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Wrong Speech

It is apparent that amongst all living beings, humans are known as the biggest liars. You must have witnessed the trouble and commotion caused by wrong speech, such as lies, unjust speech, caustic remarks, gossip, and unfounded rumors.

Some people can escape and survive anywhere after cheating others because of their tactful and cunning way of talking while innocent people get into trouble. So people must associate with them wisely.

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The Buddha spoke about the four Kinds of wrong speech. The first is lying. When a person goes to a court of justice, or is in the company of relatives and friends, he would say ' I know' when he does not, and ' I don't know' when he does. To save himself, or for the sake of some small gain, he deliberately utters lies.

The second is backbiting. When a person wanders here or there, he spreads falsehood around to cause disruption. He breaks up fellowship, does not reconcile those at strife, finds pleasure and delight in quarrels, and utters words to incite others to quarrel.

The third is harsh speech. The words spoken are insolent and rude, bitter for others to hear. People always accuse others, even for minor mistakes yet keep quiet when the latter do some good deeds. One writer says, " when I am good everybody forgets, but when I am bad everybody remembers."

The fourth is idle babbling. This speech is made by a person speaking out of turn on things non-existence or irrelevant. His speech is unrestrained, out of place, thoughtless and does not bring any benefit whatsoever.

The next time before we speak, we must think before opening our mouths. The injunction 'Think before you speak' can help us avoid getting into disputes or arguments and avoid hurting others unnecessarily. We must analyse our thoughts and intentions before expressing them. We must not only know what to say, but also why, when, where and how to say it.

A wise man knows how to avoid problems by being careful what he says. There is a saying that even a fish will not get caught on a hook if he knows how to keep his big mouth shut at the right time. There is a fable to illustrate this truth.