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adila39 replied at 24-8-2018 02:41 PM
eh tak sama hehehehe
kalau i jadi sis...i will go...bawakla mak sekali. anak anak sis dah besar ...
Anak yg kecik umur 7yrs old sis, ayah pn ada lagi, nak tinggal dia nanti bising pulak, nak kena apply cuti jgk, bknnya co sendiri, hehe, faktor kewangan lagi..
Byk benda kena fikir tau....so berangan je la |
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oooo hmmm ye la...then sis pegi dekat dekat je.... just check in some hotel ke with the kids
i teringinla tp beza i berdua je kang mati kutu...heheheh anak dila 6 tahun, semangat tapi manja nauzubillah. nanti dia cakap mama nak shusu..mama nak dokong hehehehe
hmmmm kat tempat sis tu banyakkkk tempat best boleh pegi...lainlah shah alam ni .....jam manjang..kadang rasa nak pindah duduk kampung and bercucuk tanam...hehehehe tapi malang sungguh kampung takde..apa lagi kebun..cacing pun takut
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Post time 26-8-2018 11:18 AM
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Kelam kabut today packing...pastu urus apa patut kat anak..tu pun ada yg x siap siap jugak....
stressful ahad. sakit hati kena travel on sunday sbb isnin kena ada to show face and attend meeting yg bangang
kalaula i kaya sekarang jugak i benti kejeeeeee...hahahahaha pastu? tidooo je... kumpul lemak.
apa nak buat bila kita stress...
hmmmm tarik nafas and stay calm...so thats what im doing now. |
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Tanam sajork anak itewww hidup hidup kalau dia antara penyebab kau jadi kelam kabut.....
Settle one aspect of your stress.....khennn?
Kohkohkoh
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Post time 28-8-2018 08:25 AM
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28.8.2018
On the way office
I finally decide to stay on. So will not change to new place to soon. A sudden changed ni maybe sbb after i pikir so many things...tgk muka boss i kesian pulak. And rasanya xpe kot bersabar lebih sikit and improve myself. Stop complaining..and yes i will do that.
And stick to original plan...pencen at 45 years old nanti. Hopefully and moga allah makbulkan
So, have u decide anything big in ur life? |
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Post time 28-8-2018 04:11 PM
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caner nak buat niiii rindu pulakkk aduhaiiii...fokus fokus fokus...kena tepek sini sbb xleh share dgn sesapa |
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Post time 28-8-2018 05:33 PM
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Edited by adila39 at 28-8-2018 12:14 PM
tapau mc d. i rasa nak makan ayam goreng mc d. hmmmm hati ni rasa mcm nak terbanggg ke langit biru....so boleh terbang freely...xd sapa halang apa yg nak i buat
dear heart, please make me strong
dear mind please make me wise
dear soul please make me calm
i doa and i close my eyes...how deep n madly i need allah to help me...dia je tau how i feel
rindu pulak kat my son...klu ada kat rumah boleh i panggil dia sonnnn nak hugggg
i manja dgn anak i... sometimes i akan put my head kat shoulder dia....nnt dia usap pipi i
kadang tetiba dia hug i
ada reason jugak knp allah berikan i anak imagine klu i sorang sorang...ntah apa i buat
i wish i can whisper to stars and u can feel what i feel
heheheeheh melankolik pulak...
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Post time 28-8-2018 07:07 PM
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Post time 29-8-2018 06:51 PM
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29Aug
Office home
Today a small briefing to safety group on medical surveillance. Pot pot pet and then decide pegi makan kat my fav caffee.. tiap kali datang ni la yg i makan and minum. Same menu same place..most of the time.
My colleague ni she is 49yrs old and a widow..husband meninggal mengejut few years back. Anak pun tiga je sorang dah kawen and another two masih remaja.
She is seeing someone and dia tunjuk i gambar bf..not bad nampak baikla i rasa...so i told her...u are no longer young kak...so if u think he is a good man and boleh jaga u...go and ask him...serious atau main main. Ajakla kahwin.. afterall why waste time benda baik
Tak payah grand wed, a simple nikah je. Memalu dia angguk...so my best wishes to her
Despite me saying all this, and apart me being so confident and mcm i tau je apa nak buat. Matter fact im not quite sure what i shud do w myself.
Ya Allah please show me the way. How deeply i need someone to guide me. Anyway i know i am strong and i am ok so meantime i nak wish everyone finding ur happiness
I nak add sikit about my parents, both above 60..my dad baru 68 masih segak and sharp mind. My mum pulak biasalah darah tinggi and jantung tp alhamdulillah...cuma i kena hari hari pesan mak makan...jgn x makan...sbb mak i ni suka diet..xnak gemuk...heheheh mak i kat rumah pun pakai lipstik..kalau ke kedai pun dressing macam nak ke wedding..kalah i...kadang dia akan seloroh apalah selekeh naa anak mama ni...anyway...i risaukan my parents, usia gini mmg dah x close ke? benda remeh pun nak bergaduh..sebulan i rasa seminggu je ok. selebihnya x my dad merajuk my mum...me as the one yg ada usually try nak solvekan..but end up i yg stress and kena marah...hahahah so i rasa and tell myself...kalau i dah tua usia gini and kalau ada rezekila ada partner xmohla i gini...klu ble romantik sampai tua bangka...still i love my parents and they are awesome.
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Edited by adila39 at 30-8-2018 02:24 AM
30 Aug 2018
Office
Pepagi today dah stress, mak terlewat bangun and end up my son tak kesekolah. Today ada national parade kat school dia...tadika kan so excitingla...bendera and gear head semua dah buatkan.
Hmmm i call dia and ni dia cakap kat i
mama im so mad!!! im the most confident student at school why they dont wait for me.??? they are not a kind people!
huhuhuhuh nak pujuk dia...okayla mama balik nanti kita gi laser tag...hmm yg i sendiri tak tau how nak main..and kalau pegi i dgn dia je surela x happening....hahahahah
oh my, i kena adjust myself jadi flamboyance sikit and rough kot kalau nak being a fun mama! i read a thread somewhere, a single parent terpaksa dress up like a dad..sbb anak dapat project tell about your dad. And mak dia wiliingly berlakon as a dad..obvioulsy the son dah set in mind his mama is his dad and his mama..same like my son
So i la yg kena ubah sikit..here there
rasa penat sbb stress over this petty things...small matter but a big deal to a 6 yrs old boy. i pun rasa dissapointed sbb tak ada kat rumah for now...
i guess anak i kena deal with this...at least dia belajar emosi ni and how nk control bila dissapointed. hmmm its his journey and im so sory son...u only have me  mama cannot give u a complete family...not just yet...but hey!!! we kan a team mate... love u sayang. |
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Kesian anak u, his big day tu, tapi yea lah, kadang2 benda terjadi di luar kawalan kita...hope dia ok
Dila dah balik kan? Blh ajak yr son pi tgk sambutan hari kemerdekaan |
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Post time 31-8-2018 07:51 AM
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Salam Merdeka!
Belum balik, and merdeke kita not just about bunga api and so on...hahahhaah merdeka niii haaaa cousin nikah..aiishhhh kena bangun pagiii and siap...hahahahah malassssnyaaaaa! |
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Hi adilla! Lama tak kacau ur diary
Nak tumpang my luahan
30-aug 10xx pm. My phone ringing .from familiar number which has been deleted from my contact list. Just ignore until the ring ended. Few minutes later, the bloody phone ring again and again from the same number
Bila angkat, familiar voice said “ hai xxx, how are u. Satu suara yg sangat familiar. Satu suara yg suatu ketika dulu bisa meredakan stress, menguntumkan senyuman, rasa diawang awangan bila mendengarnya
Answered with my monotonous and dull reply. She tried her best to warm-up the conversation. Half of me said maintain ur dull reply but other half said , no...this is not u plus she need ur attention, act like u normally did . The conversation ended few minutes later
But something which triggered inside me never ended. Although the conversation has ended few hours ago. Shittttt!! I’m trapped. Should i? No..big NO
Sempena hari merdeka...moga di merdekakan from this feeling.
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Post time 1-9-2018 01:34 PM
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Elated replied at 31-8-2018 11:04 AM
Hi adilla! Lama tak kacau ur diary
Nak tumpang my luahan
Follow ur heart beb. |
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Post time 1-9-2018 01:40 PM
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On the way wedding...again, and yes. and next week again. X ble excuse sbb cousin rapat. But again mmg malas sungguh...pakai baju royal blue and black scarf and rasa macam Raya pulak...make up kan pengantin...hentam je since bukan pakar.. but alhamdulillah nampak sweet...hahaha my cousin pun lelaki je pun bedak je la...and apart busy schedule...masih rasa sayu...xtaulah nape...esp semalam...pak imam recite al fatihah tu... sayu je...susah nak describe tapi Allah tahu apa i rasa...klu org tau mesti depa kata cengengnya...ehhh i x moody pun malas sgt happy...but bila i sorang..nk tido nak solat nak lain lain tu between myself...tu yg rasa sayu ..but again...life is a waste kalau sayu manjangkan...so apa pun we pun in one side. otak kita ni pun boleh compartmentalized kan..so apa susah...time nak sedih sedih je lah...time nak happy happy je la....sib baik anak i ada. mama this mama that |
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Keep on writing sis. Ada masa sy baca life story u  |
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Post time 1-9-2018 10:02 PM
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Guna diy je... semua recycle apa ada..surprise kat cousin...bagila tido one night kat hotel...a gift for newly weds...hahahah at least happy for them |
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Post time 2-9-2018 07:33 PM
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Stop kat air keroh...me my brother and son. alahai jammm...
arghh i xtau salah ke apa i ckp semalam...how i feel...ishhh rasa segan betul...jarang pulak ngadu gitu..makin tua makin cengengla ..tgu lps maghrib and sambunh drive |
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Post time 2-9-2018 10:59 PM
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Alhamdulillah dah sampai...sampai je angkat bag and terus basuh baju. I pulak jenis xsuka lengah... xsempat duduk pun dah basuh all and kemas...mandikan my son and makan...settle i ask my son go and rest. Suddenly my son hug me..and mata berair..ehhh why son...i dont want u to leave me..i dont want to be alone...laaa...no syg...mama will always be here w you. i dont want you to go to work...ngape tetiba pulak sedih...apalah dia pikir...settle pujuk...and barulah ok... bila i cakap...okayla... tomorrow absent...hahahaha...sib baikla dpt mak yg ruggerd kalau yg jenis leceh jenuh ko nak...xble ponteng tadika pun.
Check phone...banyaknya wassap yg x best..malas nak bukak. Betterlah shower and sleep hope for a better day esok. Bfr that bak share this song...by John mayer.. love it |
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Post time 2-9-2018 11:02 PM
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Category: Cinta & Perhubungan
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Post time 24-8-2018 03:44 PM
