Edited by ifanonline at 8-8-2024 05:16 PM
Is Asking Men To Change Diapers An Attack on Masculinity?Asking men to engage in childcare is seen by some as an attack on traditional masculinity and the roles men have historically played.
BY NATALIE HASCHINTA
AUGUST 8, 2024
A recent TikTok video by Faizul Ridzuan, CEO and founder of FAR Capital on TikTok (@wtfaizulbro) has ignited a significant debate about parenting roles.
The video begins by stitching a clip where a woman made a claim that “men want to have kids but don’t want to be fathers.”
@wtfaizulbro then adds his own controversial opinions, suggesting that men should not engage in childcare duties, leaving the responsibility solely to women.
This provocative start, combined with his biased views, has generated a wide range of reactions from viewers.
His claims that men should focus on earning money and providing for the family, leaving childcare responsibilities to women.
He argues that historically, men have not been involved in childcare due to their roles as protectors and providers, a stance that has sparked considerable debate.
He kept using historical contexts to proof his point such as, “Men were primarily responsible for providing and protecting, while women took on childcare and domestic duties. This traditional division of labor was seen as necessary during times of war and economic hardship when men were away from home.”
This caused various viewer comments along with an ongoing debate about gender roles in parenting.
Aimee argues that financial support alone is insufficient; many families need both parents to share childcare responsibilities due to economic constraints.
She emphasizes that support should not be limited to financial aspects but should also include active parenting.
Meanwhile, Sunsueria H Musa advocates for gender equality in parenting, arguing that even if a wife stays at home, both parents should equally share childcare responsibilities.
This includes managing the child’s health, education, and emotional well-being.
More comments can be found on X (formerly known as Twitter), where the video was shared by Faiz Edzahar, asking for opinions on the video. https://www.tiktok.com/@wtfaizulbro/video/7400000843421863169
However, there was contradiction in @wtfaizulbro’s argument.
His claim that men should not need to raise their sons, contrasted with his assertion that “a mother can raise a baby to become a boy but the boy can only be made a man by his father.”
This statement implies that fathers have a crucial role in shaping their sons into men, which contradicts his earlier position that men should avoid childcare responsibilities.
To end his video, he stated that “If a man has to pay for everything and also take care of the kids, then what’s the purpose of having a wife?”
Such comments have no basis in science and are merely the opinion of a person who obviously has no knowledge of the subject.
If Faizul had bothered to even Google the matter before offering such an opinion, he would know that children of absentee fathers face greater risk of drug and alcohol abuse, decreased physical and emotional health including higher rates of aggression and suicide, lower educational achievements, higher rates of crime, and higher rates of teen pregnancy.
Faizul mentions Bill Gates and Elon Musk as examples of fathers whose only contributions were financial.
Picture: WikipediaHowever, Gates credits his own success to having a father who guided and supported him his entire life and Gates himself is an involved father who drove his daughter to school every day even when he was running Microsoft.
Meanwhile, Musk regularly spends time with his children and his ex-wife Talulah Riley even labeled him a devoted father. Musk is also frequently photographed with his children and takes them to work events across the world.
Faizul argues that women were not given the right to vote because they didn’t go to war.
There doesn’t appear to be any basis to support his claim, but in the U.S. only white male landowners were initially given the right to vote because racist and sexist views that saw non-whites and women as inferior or incapable
In summary, we can only conclude that Faizul’s arguments are clearly the result of subscribing to toxic masculinity, are based on ignorance and should not be taken seriously by anyone.
So, should governments implement policies to encourage men’s greater involvement in caregiving and domestic duties?
We asked a dad in our office for comments
Looking outside social media, we decided to ask a dad in our office what he thinks of fatherhood and what it means to him:
‘It is important for a man to be able to wear many hats and balance his many responsibilities. This means that he cannot choose between raising his children and feeding them. He must do both. Faizul’s comments are just a lazy, irresponsible, immature, and uninformed excuse for men to shirk their duties and he deserves to be condemned for promoting such nonsense.’
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